We can’t expect everybody to be there for us, all at once. So it’s a lucky thing that really, all you need is *someone*.

Yeah this is just a TV commercial. An extremely moving and touching commercial that actually makes you stop and think, even long after the commercial is over.

Ok, this was just me being emo.

Crying out to the sky because she was lonely and hurt
But only the devil responded, because god wasn’t there…

Back when I was a little girl, I was a dreamer. But people told me I should be practical. The flames of promising dreams were always burning stronger, kindling in my soul like a smoldering fire. I saw great things in the soft daze of a summer day and in the starry sky of a long winter night. Faith replaced fear, the way sunshine replaces gloomy dark clouds. My dreams were nursed through bad days until they were brought back to light.

I believe the eye cannot see what credence promises. Dreamers dream. We feel the excitement of infinite possibilities. We see, not black and white or grey, but vivacious and sparkling colors. We see potential. We are secret keepers of hope and skies without limit. We are your friend, your family, your neighbor. We are the gaudy and pretentious man sitting at a table of a fancy restaurant. We are the filthy beggar in the street. We are the woman on the mosque steps, her body formless beneath her hijab. We are the factory worker from another land. We are the stranger smiling at you on the bus. We are in regions of war and terror, in bustling cities, in the quiet countryside… We are here and we are there.

We walk among the arson of unbelievers, letting them tear apart our body but never reaching our soul. Just like the phoenix bird that rises out of the ashes, we never surrender. We let nothing hold us back from exploring our wildest fantasies and aspirations. And even through all life’s setbacks and disappointment, we still go on because the future is ours. We are not scared. We go on because we believe in a better day. We stay true to our beliefs.

When I was a little girl, people told me to be practical. I chose to be a dreamer. I chose to be a dreamer and an achiever.

As it stands now, there really is no such thing as a definitive end of a marriage, the way there is a definitive beginning of one. There is no defining moment after which both of the spouses can feel truly free from each other and no longer married; Our society simply expect couples to find their own way of emotionally ending their marriages and of somehow moving on as single people again. We expect a divorcing couple to feel closure from a static piece of court ordered paper alone.

Out of respect for how hard it can be, many marriage counselors have agreed that adopting a divorce ceremony can help divorcing couples achieve closure. The ceremony would mainly be a private ceremony meant only to dissolve a marriage in a more immediate and emotionally concrete way, so as not to prolong or confuse the matter unnecessarily as is often currently the case. Now of course, if the divorcing couple wishes to plan a joyful ceremony where families and friends could attend, this is up to them! And questions about children and division of property are often discussed in private.

Now just as we have beautiful wedding vows, we also have divorce vows. Let me give you a few examples:

Minister: Do you, ****, promise to honor yourself and your independence, to live life to the fullest without sorrow or hardship, to live life and love life without him/her?

Ex-spouse to be: I do…

~*~

Minister: Do you, ****, consent to the dissolution of your marriage to ****, with the full understanding that the swearing of this statement will result in a final divorce?

Ex-spouse to be: I do.

~*~

Minister: With the swearing of these statements, the marriage of **** and **** is now dissolved. And I pronounce you… divorced.

Now let’s head to the divorce party and have a toast to celebrate! Yayyy!!!

A few days ago while browsing the internet, I came across an article about cases of feminicide in various parts of Africa and Central America. I was shocked when I read the stories of those women who had been abused in the most aggressive and violent ways one can possibly imagine. This article particularly gave me goose bumps. The more I read, the more I got disgusted. A sick feeling had begun in the pit of my stomach as I discovered the atrocities done to those women. Unfortunately the article I’m talking about is in French. I couldn’t find many articles about feminicide in English that were as heart-rending. For those who understand French, please do read the story.

I’ll try to describe in a few words what this is all about for those who don’t read French. The article relates the stories of victims of feminicide in Congo. The cruelties they were put through: mutilated and sexually assaulted, with breasts hacked off, objects thrust up body cavities and deep slashes across chest and face. “A soldier cut open a pregnant woman, killed her baby, cooked it and forced the other prisoners to eat it.” This is how barbarian those murderers are…

I found another article here in English. This one is about feminicide in Mexico.
We should become aware of such cruelties done to women. We shouldn’t close our eyes and ignore the facts that in some places of the world, women are being tortured to death… simply because they are women.

The world celebrated International Woman’s Day on March 8. But somewhere somehow, if we scratch the surface and look deeper, there is a dark spot that still needs to be taken care of.

Indifference. Silence. Impunity. Each plays a role in feminicide. This has to stop.

Maybe it’s about time to admit it. I’ve tried, oh yea, I’ve tried so very hard but today I’m standing on the line between giving up and seeing how much more I can take. My heart is heavy with sad thoughts I keep for myself. I’ve been fighting my inner demons… I’ve stumbled and picked myself up, over and over again with no safety net.

I’m tired of feeling bad for things I don’t even understand anymore. I’d rather feel nothing. It’s better… it’s easier.

Happy new year people.

Do you know many people with those traits? Believe me when I tell you that the world is full of them. They are everywhere… So called friends, families…

Sometimes I wonder. Can I really trust other people? Or are they going to stab me in the back someday?

Years back we stepped into high school… individuals seeking to do well, to find our identity, to discover our path in life. We had a new attitude, looking to fit in, wanting to achieve something. We followed our daily routines, expanded our circle of friends, and gossiped about dates and parties. We just couldn’t wait to get older.

We rebelled and we learned. We got accepted and we got rejected. We had crushes and we thought our life was over when we got heart broken. And yet, we still couldn’t wait to get older.

Somehow along the way, we finally grew up. We went our own directions. Some started to work right after school, some went to universities here or abroad. We lost sight of the people we considered to be our closest friends. Maybe for a short time or maybe forever. Another life… getting excited to start over, feeling sad about the things we leave behind, being anxious to move on. We experience real life. We happen to change and to become different people.

We sometimes remember our school years, our friends and our innocence. We look fondly at the memories. Some of us are lucky to still have that same best friend. So many years brought change. But friendship held us strong when things were shaky, in good times and bad, in laughter and tears, through boyfriends, bad grades, family problems, and love … With them, we wanted to grow up so quickly.

Life teaches us so much. It forces our real friends to come to the front, while the rest take their places in the shadows of our memories. We lose some people but through real friendship we keep the ones we will need most in our life.

Last night I “met” a school friend on facebook. We went to primary school together, ended up at the same high school but somehow we lost each other when we both went for further studies. After so many years we finally managed to get back in contact. I was happy but at the same time it felt strange. It brought me back to those school years where things were so different. And as we talked, I realized that indeed a lot has changed. We both went through terrible family issues, we got bruised but in the end, we survived.

Maybe the time has gone, but the faces and the friendships I recall.

*jump jump*

*delighted*

I am so glad that it’s Saturday! The past 2 weeks at work were stressful and hectic and I wonder how I survived till now! >.>

But definitely, it feels great to be home, listen to some music, play pet society on facebook [yeah I'm addicted to that game -_-] and unwind comfortably.

Still, there’s a little something that has been bothering me for a few minutes now. As I’m writing this post, I can hear my neighbor, who also happens to be my aunt, talking loudly and giving instructions to her housemaid. So far, nothing peculiar… except that I just hate the way she speaks to the old maid! This is not civilized talking. This is merely yelling and being rude in everything she says. And I feel really sorry for the poor maid.

This is not the first time. I often overhear my aunt as she addresses her housemaid and she always has something very unpleasant to say. This is not just about the words she uses, but also her tone of voice. It’s almost as if she’s talking to some animals. And the housemaid just remains silent, perhaps too intimidated to say anything. But for sure, deep inside, I am certain that she is hurt. Who wouldn’t be?

So what? She’s a housemaid. But she’s also a human being with a heart, right? Show some respect damn it! No one deserves to be spoken to meanly or in a condescending manner…

Ok, I can understand that maybe sometimes the old lady is not doing the household chores as my aunt expects her to. But is that a reason to yell at her in the driveway where everyone can hear the argument and call her names like “silly old woman”, “dope” or “brainless person”?

If I were in the housemaid’s shoes, I would have quit a long long time ago. But then again, she must have her own reasons to stay at my aunt’s place and bear all that shit. I remember, once I was in the backyard and I saw her and she waved at me. I said hello and asked how she was doing. She told me she was exhausted because she has to work a whole day at my aunt’s place and when she gets home, she has to take care of her ninety year old mother and her sick husband. So, certainly she needs the money and she takes all the blows silently without complaining.

Big mouth, little consideration for others… I’d say without hesitation that my aunt IS the “brainless person” in the whole story!