New year? Not so much
Jan 4th, 2009 by Angele
So this is the new year… And I don’t feel any different. In fact, I’ve been feeling like crap for the past week. I really didn’t want to start this year 2009 with that state of mind but circumstances made it that way… unfortunately. I have come to a point where I don’t want to smile anymore and I don’t want to fake being happy. When I look in the mirror, I stare at my own reflection but I don’t recognize myself. Why is my reflection someone I don’t know? There’s a look in those eyes that even I haven’t seen before.
Maybe it’s about time to admit it. I’ve tried, oh yea, I’ve tried so very hard but today I’m standing on the line between giving up and seeing how much more I can take. My heart is heavy with sad thoughts I keep for myself. I’ve been fighting my inner demons… I’ve stumbled and picked myself up, over and over again with no safety net.
I’m tired of feeling bad for things I don’t even understand anymore. I’d rather feel nothing. It’s better… it’s easier.
Happy new year people.
Hey dear, I hope you are okay. Come talk to me in MSN sometime, okay? I’ve added you using a new address (will be using that temporarily, reasons later
*hugs*
*speechless*
I haven’t been on any IMs for a long while.. but if you need me to l end you my ears, you can always email or sms me, my friend.
*HUGS*
‘sup Angele!?!
please get some help, if it’s very very very serious!
you don’t want to repress ur feelings too much…
coz when everything implode, it will get worst!
take it from me as I’ve been there…
find someone you can trust to confide in!
cheer-up! there is usually a solution….
+ I know I may be repeating myself: but hey usually, it’s the darkest before dawn, yeah?
Hey,
I hope you are feeling better now and I understand what you mean when you said “inner demons”. I comprehend that emotion very well but this shall pass for you.
Hopefully this year will be a happier one for you my dear friend.
Hugs!
I know I’m just an outsider looking in from way beyond your sphere, but I had no idea things have been so unpleasant for you lately. I guess that explains your irregular postings and visits over the past few months.
Maybe you just need a new direction, or at least a new distraction for a while. At least until the music comes back.
Speaking of music, I made a song to (hopefully) help cheer you up. It’s linked from my blog.
*give tough cookie hugs to Angele*
cheer up soon, my friend.
yo, howz it goin?
ya ok?
Thanks to all of you for your kind messages. Much appreciated.